Gorgeous weather and craving RAW!

It's a gorgeous day here in NY and it just makes me ACHE to be healthy! I wish I was fit and trim and could just go for a quick jog or a hike. Instead, I feel lethargic and fat and I'm so, SO sick of it.



I'm still determined to start on my path to going RAW. I found a great blog that tells you how to be raw for $10 a day or less. And she's giving away a great blender! I entered to win it, and that will be my sign that raw is the way to go for me. Although, I'm already pretty set on incorporating this lifestyle into my own. I've read numerous success stories and everyone just seems to healthy and vibrant AND they LOOK healthy! So many times you see people who are fit, vegan, in shape, whatever, but their skin is dull, they have bags under their eyes...just don't look like they're healthy on the inside. I think if i start to give my body NUTRIENTS instead of just CALORIES, it will start to respond better, crave less, and detoxify.

I know, I know...I'm all talk right now. I'm just on such a tight budget that I don't have room to experiment with recipes. SO, I need to find a few recipes that I think I would like, and just buy enough ingredients for that. That's do-able. Most involve spinach, apples, carrots, celergy, maybe some onion and garlic, and that's about it!

Plus, I turn 28 years old on Thursday and I'm sick of wasting my life. I've been going through the past few years hiding out from social situations because I'm embarrassed of how fat I am, or my clothes don't fit, or I just feel too lethargic. I want to start LIVING life! Don't get me wrong, I'm as fun-loving and good spirited as they come, but I can do better. I want to be adventerous and LIVE. And I was thinking, "Why is it so hard?" I want to be all these different girls I see: the skinny girl who's good at yoga, the healthy girl who eats well all the time, the fit girl who runs 5ks all the time. But why CAN'T I be? All's I have to do is just start DOING it! Today I'm the girl who ate pretzels and honey mustard for breakfast, but if I just make the switch in my mind of "Okay, you WERE the girl who ate junk but now you're the girl who eats healthy and nutritious foods" then I can be! And if I want to be good at yoga, well then I need to freaking start practicing yoga everyday! WHY DON'T I JUST DO THIS??? Well, I am. I'm picking up ingredients today and going to start by replacing ONE meal a day with raw foods. And I'll be happy with that for a few days, a week or maybe even 2. And I won't bash myself for not doing better. I'm going to love and appreciate myself for making THAT change. Then, when I'm ready, I will replace 2 meals with raw foods, or maybe one meal plus a raw snack, etc. The idea is that my body will start craving the nutrient-rich foods and not the empty calorie "diet" food and/or junk food.

I'm doing it, I'm doing it today for myself. I'm going to start off my next year of life on the right foot.

Are you living the best life you can lead?

Valentine's Day and a Pity Party

So Valentine's Day was nice. My boyfriend was fighting the stomach virus that's going around so he couldn't have a heavy meal, which was fine by me and my rolls of fat! So I went to his apt and he had bought me a teddy bear, a balloon, a dozen red roses and a new Wii game. LOL...I'm 27 years old but just a big kid. It was Mario Kart for wii, I LOVED it haha. He had also ordered us Greek Salads which was PERFECT for me! I looooove greek salads and I also didn't feel guilty about eating it. We just drank water. Until I came back home and my mom had left some vday Peeps in my room...I've eaten 5 since last night. :( I will throw the rest out, I swear.

I feel so lethargic lately. I'm getting my period so I have all the lovely PMS symptoms. I just feel like napping all day long and watching DVDs, but I have a few midterms this week so I must do a lot of studying. I'm also supposed to start the Couch to 5k Running Program again today. I hate running in the daytime b/c I know everyone in this town. So I'll save that for around dusk this evening. I HAVE to do it, I'll be so disappointed in myself if I put it off even another day. My Women's Soccer team starts up in a month and I really, REALLY do not want to embarrass myself too much. I played with some of these girls back in HS (10 years ago, my God...) and I was maybe 60lbs lighter then! :-\ I'm 5'11" which helps spread that weight around at least, but also makes me feel like a big huge monster as well.

I always feel like I lose my motivation around the time of my period. Got to try and re-light that spark today. Any ideas? I guess taking a shower today would help! LOL

I just feel like lying around today and feeling sorry for my fat self...Okay, this is a very boring blog and I'm just rambling on in no particular order. I hope you all had a lovely Valentine's Day and found a few moments to love yourself!

Fell off the wagon, temporarily...and LEMON WATER

UGH, I'm so dissapointed with myself. I sorta fell off the wagon for 2 weeks and I have a feeling that it has a direct correlation with me not posting in 2 weeks. I had computer trouble and didn't feel like typing from a public computer...and consequently my diet seemed to go down hill as well. That's another 5lbs I could've been down but now I'm up 2lbs. :( And here it is, Valentine's Day weekend and I feel so disgusted with myself I'm hoping my boyfriend and I don't even go out to dinner on Sunday. Also, I have a work party with old co-workers of mine next week and I was so excited to be down hopefully 15lbs by then, but now that looks like it won't happen. It makes me not even want to go to this party and see this people and let them see how much weight I've gained. :(

Okay, pity party over...I'm back on track now...I HAVE to be! This morning I had a bowl of cereal, lunch will be a veggie burger on 1 slice of toasted whole wheat bread (I slice it down the middle so it becomes two very thin slices) and dinner will be steamed chicken and broccoli with brown rice. So I didn't meet my short term goals for upcoming events, I still have summer to work towards! AND St. Patrick's day-where I tend to run into a lot of people from HS and college, etc. So that's what I'm looking forward to now. :) Plus, being in the holistic health field, I feel like my advice and what I say would have more of an impact if I was in shape. Also, that women's soccer team I'm joining starts up in 5 weeks and I'd like to get into better shape by then.



Today will be about eating low glycemic again and drinking lots of water. Lemon water, to be exact. My holistic nutrition class taught me the importance of lemon water...and it just so happens to actually be my favorite beverage anyway. Some of the many benefits are as follows: it kills bacteria in your body, it helps prevent new bacteria from forming, good for colds, sore throats, asthma, liver complaints and helps to move your bowels. Here's a link to a webpage I found: http://www.lookgreat-loseweight-savemoney.com/lemon-water.html

I guess it doesn't help that it's noon and I'm still in bed, huh? :-\ That's it, I'm ending this blog now, signing off and getting out into the world. Today I will paint my nails and tidy up my room and HOPEFULLY do some pilates before my date tonight. That's what's on my plate for the day, what's on yours?

At the 5lbs. Mark :)

Well, I wasn't sure what today's weigh-in would be like since I didn't drink my diuretic tea yesterday, but I was pleasantly surprised to be down .5lbs from yesterday morning! :) I'm just about down 5lbs now (I've been using two different scales, so it's a bit confusing!). I'm quite pleased with myself...I just want to hurry up and drop a substantial amount of weight so I can start wearing nice outfits again and fitting into those illusive jeans that I haven't been able to squeeze over my thighs in years! But, I have to have faith and patience, and trust that I will get there if I just keep sticking to this!

My cold feels MUCH better after I sweated it out yesterday. I don't have the headache, bad taste in my mouth, heavy head, and stiff neck anymore but I DO have a sore throat now. So, I'm going to gargle some Organic Apple Cider vinegar and hopefully that does the trick! I'm excited that the sweating method seems to have worked, how simple! AND drug-free. :)

Breakfast: 1 piece of buttered whole wheat toast and 2 hard boiled eggs
Supplements: Spirulina and organic women's multi-vitamin

That's all I've had so far, but I must admit I'm back in bed. :-\ It's a cold windy day here in NY and I'm off today, so it's hard to get motivated! I have a hair appt @ 2pm which I'm VERY excited for. My roots are terribly overgrown and it also makes me feel so good when I get my highlights done. :) So that's what I'll be doing today for myself!

Then at 5:30pm I work with a disabled young man in his apartment teaching him how to cook. Then the rest of the evening I'll be spending at my boyfriend's apartment. Which I'm looking forward to. I want to avoid having to find a snack while I'm there, and hearing his comments though, so I'm going to bring a grilled chicken breast in a Ziploc bag! hahaha I'm also going to stop at Cold Stone and get this low-fat frozen yogurt w/fruit mixed in as a treat for us. I'm going to check the calories of it online in a minute. I think I need to start tracking my calories. Anyone know of a good website? I want one that automatically knows the calorie count for foods...I couldn't be bothered looking up the individual calories for everything!

I still haven't done yoga yet, as part of my 3x's a week requirement. But I still have tomorrow and the following days, right? :)

Okay, that's all for now I guess. If I type anymore then I'll REALLY be rambling!

Be Well,
Ava

Another Pound and The Law of Attraction

First, I'm very excited to receive a blog award from my ONE follower, thefatchickweigh.blogspot.com LOL but I'm excited nontheless, THANK YOU! (I'm having problems with inserting links)

I'm supposed to name 10 things that make me happy:
1-my friends
2-my family
3-my boyfriend
4-going to school for acupuncture/oriental medicine
5-snow
6-sunshine
7-holidays
8-an outfit that fits well and look good
9-compliments :)
10-the overall good health of myself and those close to me

Now I'm supposed to give it to 10 other people, but I don't follow that many, yet :-\ But here's a few that I like:
getpastthemoment.blogspot.com
blossoming-me.blogspot.com
learningtobeless.blogspot.com
http://krystros.blogspot.com

Now onto today's post. I woke up and weighed-in on Wii Fit and it says I was down another .7lbs. yay! I'm worried that I'm losing too much water weight by drinking so much Dandelion Root tea everday, so today I didn't drink any (plus it makes me very tired) so we'll see what the weigh-in is like tomorrow. I didn't do too badly eating today:
Breakfast: Organic Flaxgrain cereal with whole milk
Lunch: grilled chicken with 1c whole wheat pasta and tomato sauce
Dinner: I slept thru dinner and was late to class and craving ice cream. So I got a VERY SMALL chocolate non-fat, no sugar added treat. :)
Snack: was starving just now and didn't even feel like writing so I had 2 pieces of whole wheat toast with butter and jelly...not that greatest but it tasted delightful and I ate so little today I think it's okay.

A month ago I had been reading The Secret, and it says that if you want to lose weight, then stop focusing on how fat you are and instead picture yourself at your dream weight. It says your body and your universe don't know the difference between "I want to be fat" and "I DON'T want to be fat"...all's it hears is "fat" so your body and your surroundings make it feasible for you to be fat. I really do believe in this because during the time I was my thinnest (10 years ago, in HS...ugh, has it been that long?) I used to daydream all the time about being thin, and having lots of boyfriends, etc. And, sure enough, I had a ton of friends and plenty of date offers and I was pretty damn thin! So that's what I've been trying to do now, plus it's a blast imagining all the things I can do once I'm not held back by my self-consciousness. I'm not obese or anything, I'm 5'11" so being over 200lbs it's still spread out fairly well over my body. It's more of a mental thing for me...but of course I have my physical limitations as well.

For example, my girlfriends and I are meeting up with two guys we used to go to college with for dinner and drinks. Strictly platonic, plus I have a wonderful boyfriend, so I'm not worried about trying to date these guys or anything...but I'm embarrassed to go because I'm a good 30lbs heavier than the last time they saw me. :( It makes me not even want to go. Infact, I seem to want to avoid all social situations due to my weight, yet I always have so much fun when I do go. SO, I will go, of course, but I'll certainly be downing some drinks to help drown my self-consciousness! Pathetic. Can't wait to be at a weight where I'm proud to show myself off. I used to be "hot"! I'll get there, I'll get there...

Today I felt like I had a cold coming on, so I sat in my personal infrared sauna to try and sweat it out. That's what Chinese Medicine says to do, if you catch it in the first stages. I'm not sure if I sweated enough (I'm always naturally warm as it is, so to sit in a sauana is complete torture for me)...but I'm hoping it works anyway. I may try again in the morning if I still don't feel great. But that's what I did today to make myself feel good. I'm not sure what tomorrow's will be!

It's pretty late here in NY. 12:30am...so I should get to bed. I'm excited to see what the scale says tomorrow after not drinking the diuretic tea today. Hopefully I won't be overly disappointed. I don't want to dehydrate myself. I did that once with this tea. I drank it all week long then drank alcohol friday and saturday night and I had shoot pains in my back...enough to make my dad take me to the ER. While in the waiting room, it subsided and I realized I must be dehydrated. I begged to go back home, and I did thankfully, before I was embarrassed infront of the doctor for being so dehydrated. So I need to be more careful this time around. Tomorrow will be water, water, water! Lemon water, actually. I learned in my nutrition class it has a list of health benefits and is very cleansing for the body. Plus, it's actually my favorite beverage, so that works for me!

Anyway, I'm rambling now. I hope everyone is doing the best they can, at this very moment. :)

Be Well,
Ava
Days: 12 Pounds: -4

Wendy's, UGH!

I caved...I had a 5 hour break between classes last night and I drove all around looking for what I wanted/could eat. I'm on a very limited budget and the chicken on whole wheat bread I had brought didn't cut it. After passing "okay" options like Panera, Chipotle (I didn't stop b/c those meals are at least $10)...I settled on Wendy's. I got the Single Burger meal, with medium fries and a medium regular coke (which is HORRENDOUS for my hypoglycemia!!!). I regretted it immediately after eating it. I need to plan better for tomorrow. Bring better options so I don't have to buy food while I'm at school. I'm so disappointed in myself I wasn't even going to blog about it, but I had to. I also didn't feel great physically afterwards either, which was to be expected. Well, tomorrow's a new day I guess!

As soon as I got home from class, I took my organic multi-vitamin, drank spirulina in water, brewed 3 quarts of dandelion root/blueberry tea with agave for today, plus whole wheat pasta with olive oil and garlic for lunch/dinner and baked chick peas with sea salt for a snack...only to oversleep this morning and miss my 8:30am class. :( I guess I needed the sleep though. Well, I certainly have enough time to prepare myself for the rest of the day as my next class doesn't start until 2:30pm...and its YOGA!

I soooo desperately want to be a slim, sleek yogi...but I'm soooo NOT. I look like a fat and sweaty mess during the poses when no one, and I mean NO ONE, else is sweating :( I've been promising myself I'll practice at home, b/c that's all it takes to be good at yoga, is practice, but I haven't yet. Although, now that I've cleaned my room I'm more motivated to do it in this space. So that's my goal for this week is do practice yoga 3 times before next week's class.

On a slightly happy note, the scale said I didn't gain any weight (no thanks to that Wendy's excursion). I did eat it at 5pm and didn't have a single thing to eat afterwards, so I'm hoping I somehow evened it out. Today will be better, it has to be!

The thing I did for today to make myself feel good was to prepare my meals and tea last night so I wasn't rushed today AND I used those Kinoki foot detox pads. And EWWW were they gross this morning! It's controversial if they're actually pulling toxins out or if its the oils from your feet mixing with the herbs in pad and turning it black...but this morning they were completely black and GOOEY. I'll try them out for the rest of the week. :)

UPDATE!!!! I got onto wii fit and it says i'm down .9lbs from yesterday, so I'll take that! That makes my total thus far:
Days: 11 Pounds: -3lbs.

Be Well,
Ava :)

Iced Tea, Blogging and HIGH SCHOOL???

Good Morning All :) (ha, I don't think I even have a single reader yet, but I'll just pretend....)

I woke up feeling more refreshed than I have in awhile. This is my 4th day in a row of trying to maintain my blood sugar and being on a low Glycemic diet, and I have no doubt that's what the cause behind my great mood is! I stepped on the scale this morning (even though I said I wouldn't for another week) and I'm the same I was 6 days ago...BUT I've just started my "cycle" and I tend to retain water during this time, so I'm not too disappointed.

Last night around midnight I was so full of energy and in good spirits I found myself DANCING while brushing my teeth! I started thinking how I haven't felt this great since High School (which is a good 10 years and 80lbs ago!). I felt like I wanted to dress up, put on music and dance around my room like I used to! Over the past few years, my friends and I have talked about "what did we do way back when we didn't drink alcohol? We had so much fun and barely even drank!". These days we find ourselves out of options, and when we DO think of something we always drink thinking it'll make it more fun. In High School, I used to have these "Parties for 1" in my room. I'd dress up in my nicest clothes, hair and make-up done and all, blast music and just dance...imagining I was at some great party or a club that I wasn't old enough to get into yet. Don't get me wrong, I went to plenty of REAL parties as well, but this is what I did when I had some free time alone. I NEVER find myself wanting to do that these days...mostly for lack of energy. Last night, I would have if it wasn't already creeping onto 1am and if my clothes fit! :( But it was just more motivation to keep at this and get back down to a weight where I feel good about myself when I'm dressed up. These days I just wear clothes that hide my fat the best and make me feel the most comfortable. Which is sad and pathetic.

Next, I NEED to tell you all about my new favorite gadget. It's an Iced Tea maker made by Mr. Coffee. This it the model I have...I didn't even know they had other models but I got this one at K-Mart for only $20. http://www.mrcoffee.com/Product.aspx?pid=6105
It can take loose tea or tea bags and you can brew 5-7 tea bags at a time...even adding in lemon or your sweetener and it brews about 3 quarts right into the pitcher. Then you just add ice or stick it in the fridge and you have fresh, healthy iced waiting for you whenever you want it. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! I've been making Dandelion Root Tea because it's good for supporting your Adrenal Glands (an issue I have, especially with hypoglycemics) and it's also great at getting rid of extra water weight and bloating for your time of the month. ;) I add lemon slices and agave (it's a low glycemic sweetener) and I feel sooooooo good after drinking it. Seems to be curbing my appetite as well (I guess the agave is providing some glucose!). I've been telling everyone who I think will care, even just a little. Maybe it could be the good thing you do for yourself today? And for only $20, why not? :)

Next, Blogging! This has been such a great outlet for me and it really helps to keep me motivated. Even though I'm pretty sure I don't have a single reader, I still feel like "someone" is holding me responsible to this new way of eating and I don't want to let "them" down. Plus, I get to vent and blab all I want!

Today is off to a good start. Had slow-cooked oatmeal and Dandelion iced tea for breakfast. :) Lunch will probably be my whole wheat pasta with garlic and olive oil and dinner is still up in the air, as are my snacks throughout the day. I also plan to do pilates today and maybe even yoga. I prefer to do Winsor Pilates as they've worked well for me in the past. I have to dvd's: "Buns and Thighs" and her "Ab Workout". They're both great, not that difficult to do and I definitely notice results within a week or two. My soccer season is only 2 months away, I need to start exercising as well as losing this weight. I will begin running soon as well, I promise! Aside from pilates/yoga, I decided to clean up this place to make me feel better about myself. Including the inside of my car. I always feel more organized and clean internally when my external environment is clean and in order. What will YOU do today?

Be Well,
Ava

Thank God for Hypoglycemia!?

Hi All! :)
I'm starting this blog because it really helps me to write out my feelings and my daily struggles with dieting. Plus, I think i'm talking my boyfriend's ear off too much about it. I think it's therapeutic to talk about things you struggle with, plus I feel like someone's holding me responsible for sticking to a healthy lifestyle if I'm making my goal public. I'm a 27 year old woman (still find it hard to call myself a woman!) and I work part time and go to school full time for holistic medicine. While sitting in my nutrition class last semester, my professor passed out an "Are you Hypoglycemic?" questionnaire. As I started slowly checking off each question, and seemed to be checking "yes" to almost all of them, I started getting more and more amazed/shocked/excited/relieved. All these years I just thought I must be the fattest girl in the world because all I could think about when I was hungry was food and it was my first thought every morning. The questions started as: Do you suffer from extreme hunger? When you are hungry, do you get shaky, irritable, anxious, nervous, sweaty, headache, dizziness, faintness? Yes, yes, YES! Do you lie awake at night not able to get your mind to stop racing? YES! Restlessness, fatigue, unable to concentrate? YES! The list goes on and on. FINALLY I had an explanation of why I'd feel so terrible and so OBSESSED with eating once I felt the slightest pang of hunger. I also came to learn that more people than you'd realize ARE hypoglycemic, or at least borderline. Being it's a holistic school the professor said, "And why don't doctors frequently test for hypoglycemia if it's so common? Well, because there's no pill to cure it. So they wait until your pancreas is burned out, you develop diabetes, THEN they can prescribe you something for it." The truth is, if you controlled your blood sugar throughout your life, most diabetics wouldn't be diabetic. If you're not sure what hypoglycemia is, I'll explain it briefly: Basically, the foods we eat in this nation are SO processed and spiked with sugar it floods our blood with sugar (glucose), the pancreas of a hypoglycemic person overreacts and releases insulin which brings your blood sugar level back down...but in our case, it brings it TOO low so that your adrenal glands now kick in and release adrenaline and glucose-which causes the sweating, heart palpitations, nervousness, etc. etc. etc. Please, do yourself a favor and google the signs and symptoms of hypoglycemia and if you think you may have it, insist your doctor test you for it.
With that said, I'm hoping I've finally found the solution to my forever struggle with losing weight. I need to eat 6 SMALL meals, of protein and complex carbs, a day. The idea is that I'll be eating foods that SLOWLY release glucose into my blood stream (unlike sugary snacks and white breads that FLOOD your blood stream with it, causing the pancreas to overreact thus making your blood sugar level crash) and I won't get the ravenous hunger I so often feel. The problem? I don't know enough about nutrition to know what's good and bad for me, so I'm left starving, irritable and craving all the wrong foods. But, I'm reading books and internet articles and trying to learn. :)
I started yesterday, having cereal that probably wasn't the best choice but I had no better options available. Then carrots with sea salt for a snack and a Greek salad for dinner. I found myself STARVING around 9pm and drank a naturally sweetened drink which helped subside the hunger pangs. But I caved around 1am and made a grilled cheese and drank Pepsi :(. However, I did feel good for most of the day and this morning I was down 1lb! My problem is that I want to eat NATURALLY so most of the diet recommendations I find aren't helpful because they suggest jello sweetened with splenda and diet cokes. If you're not into natural health at all, I HIGHLY suggest you buy yourself Kevin Trudeau's "Natural Cures THEY Don't Want You To Know About" book. It honestly CHANGED MY LIFE....but that's a story for another day.
Another battle I'm having is trying to make my social life a HEALTHY one. It seems the only activities my friends and I do are going out to eat and DRINKING! Anyone else have the same problem? Thankfully, an old friend contacted me trying to get together a women's soccer team. I'm so excited for it! I'm far too out of shape, as I haven't played soccer since High School and I'm a good 70lbs heavier!! :( I'm thinking I could play defense though and being that the season starts in March I'm hoping to drop at least 20lbs before then. It's highly motivating as it's something I really want to do AND I don't want to completely embarrass myself on the field with being so out of shape. So, I'm going to start a running regimen that I had done a few months ago but gave up on it for no good reason. It's called podrunner, and it trains you to run a 5k but starting out running in intervals. It's free to download on iTunes so I suggest it to you guys out there who think you're too out of shape to run! It's called the "Couch to 5k Running Program" and here's a link to an explanation of it http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml
I'm assuming you all (if anyone is even reading this) are having the same struggle with dieting as I am so I hope you all do well today and treat yourself and your body as best you can. :)
What are YOU going to do today to make yourself one step closer to YOUR goal? For me, I'm going to The Vitamin Shoppe to buy some Spirulina. I read an easy recipe for a Spirulina Salad: a bed of greens (romaine lettuce, baby spinach, etc), some vegetables like celery or carrots, enough Olive Oil to just coat all the vegetables but not too much so that it accumulates on the bottom of the bowl, some sea salt and top it off with some Spirulina. I'll keep you all posted on how it tastes!
Oh, and if anyone is keeping score, my short tearm goal is to lose 64lbs. 1 day down, 1lb. down.
Take care, and be healthy!

-Ava